Ensure Mutually Beneficial Arrangements—Create A Sugar Daddy Contract
As researchers note, sugaring operates under the proposed construct of a relationship rather than a business. Nevertheless, there is also no denying that sugar relationships are transactional—one of the parties (a sugar baby) is compensated for her time (in this context the term ‘time’ includes dates, companionship, any kind of interaction, including sex) by another party—a sugar daddy. If so, should they enter into a formal sugar daddy agreement? How to create such a contract and isn’t it unenforceable? Find the answers in this guide.
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What are mutually beneficial arrangements?
Here is how sugar relationships are defined in scholarly literature:
- Sugar dating is companionship and intimacy in return for financial compensation
- A sugar relationship is an arrangement where one person provides companionship, sexual favors, or other forms of attention in exchange for personal benefit (e.g., financial support, professional advancement, etc.)
- Sugaring is essentially an arrangement between two or more people where one party offers gifts, money, or mentorship in exchange for time or company(often sex) from the other party.
As you can see, all the definitions have something in common—they all state that one party (a sugar baby) gets compensation, money, gifts, or any other compensation, in exchange for companionship. Another party (a sugar daddy), in turn, gets a sugar baby’s time and company in exchange for money. That’s exactly what people usually call mutually beneficial arrangements or mutually beneficial relationships. An SB and an SD meet each other on a niche website such as Secret Benefits or SugarDaddy.com and start a relationship—sugaring offers benefits for both partners.
The legal aspect of sugaring: Is such a mutually beneficial relationship legal?
Another important thing to discuss is the legality of sugaring. After all, you can’t conclude a sugar daddy agreement if sugar relationships aren’t legal, right?
Are sugar babies involved in sex work in the eyes of law?
No, if they are sugar babies. Let us explain what it means. As we have noted before, sugar relationships are not only about sex but also about companionship. On top of that, it’s supposed that both a sugar baby and a sugar daddy will develop some authentic feelings when dating—not necessarily romantic love but affection, friendship, etc. In other words, the concept of a relationship is no less important than the construct of business. Sexual favors are just parts of sugaring, not the primary and only one important aspect.
On top of that, sugar babies, unlike sex workers, can delay intimacy or even refuse it. Sex is subject to the consent of both sugar daddy and sugar baby. Hence, we can’t equate sugaring to prostitution. It should be noted that some specialists note that it’s in the gray area—and you can read more about it in this guide about sugar dating legalities.
So what is a sugar daddy contract and do you need it?
Sugar dating contracts are the agreements between sugar daddies and sugar babies where all the most important terms of a relationship are defined clearly. Why do they need it?
A common agreement between a SD and a SB is usually verbal, and that’s normal for this type of dating. You discuss all the terms with a potential partner, agree or not agree to some of them, negotiate, and then conclude a final agreement. However, none of the partners can be 100% sure that another party will really follow them. Some people seeking sugar relationships just accept this risk, and some want to avoid it by signing sugardaddy contracts.
Such a written document is the agreement where all the terms of a potential arrangement are outlined clearly, without any vague or uncertain terms.
Who can create sugar daddy contracts? Do they have legal force?
As we’ve noted above, sugar dating is in the gray area—it’s not illegal, but it’s also not regulated by law like most other types of activities or relationships (for example, marriage). Still, those gray areas can also make such mutually beneficial arrangements written in the paper and signed by both sugar babies and sugar daddies exist.
There is another crucially important thing to consider—all the mentioned in the previous paragraph doesn’t go for all states. You should contact your lawyer or a legal counsel and get professional advice on sugar baby arrangements and their legal force in your area. A lawyer also creates such an agreement if you decide that you really need it.
Speaking of decisions to set forth the terms of your mutually beneficial relationship in the written or verbal agreement, it’s totally up to you. If you don’t feel safe without it or are afraid that you will meet a scammer, you should consult a lawyer and ask them if you can create and sign such an agreement in your country/state.
But if it doesn’t bother you too much, you can just have a verbal agreement. The truth is most sugar babies and sugar daddies just discuss the terms of their mutually beneficial arrangements, find compromises or don’t find them, and start their relationship or abandon the idea of starting it, respectively. If you use a trusted website, follow the safety rules, and don’t send money to anyone in advance, that will work in 90% of cases.
How to create a sugar baby contract: Essential points of the agreement
If you think that all the terms of your dating arrangement must be covered in a written agreement between two parties, you can create it. But make sure that you’ve paid enough attention to the following points.
Personal information, name, and address
You can start that mutually beneficial relationship with sugar daddies or sugar babies without knowing your partner’s address or even real name, it’s not a big deal. However, if you want the terms of your sugar relationship to be recorded on paper, you need to provide the address and real name of the other person who’ll be the Party_2.
The period
You also need to indicate a date when your mutually beneficial arrangement enters into force, as well as the expected sugar dating period. For example, if you are going to start a long-term relationship with a sugars baby, you can choose 1-year period and prolong it, if necessary.
Terms of relationship—the “services”
As we’ve noted before, sugar dating is also about providing particular services, and they also can and must be listed in your contract. For example, you can ask your lawyer to mention that a sugar baby must attend the events with a sugar daddy, have dinners, regularly send text messages if the daddy contacts her first, go on vacation, and satisfy other needs, in particular, need for companionship and intimacy. On top of that, you can also indicate that emotions like love and jealousy must be excluded.
Terms of mutually beneficial relationships—the payments
Of course, another party gets compensation for the time and “services” she provides. In most cases, women who prefer to get paid for every date, including the first date, don’t sign such contracts—that won’t be necessary. In most cases, partners sign such an agreement if a sugar baby wants to receive a monthly allowance. The amount of allowance, of course, must be indicated, too. On top of that, most people who conclude an arrangement on a sugar relationship usually pay attention to gifts and extra costs that can be or can not be covered by a sugar daddy. For example, the agreement may suggest that a sugar daddy can pay extra money or give expensive gifts but only on his own initiative.
Frequency of social interactions
Another essential point to consider and mention is the frequency of your dates, vacations, etc. There’s a dire need to indicate them clearly as it often becomes a matter of dispute between sugar partners and is one of the most important terms of the arrangement.
Confidentiality
Both partners should guarantee confidentiality to the other person who signs this agreement. Partners must keep confidential all the terms of their agreement and also the private information on another partner to any third parties.
Extra terms & conditions
If you or your partner will want anything specific, if there are any special terms related to any aspect of a relationship, you should indicate this, too.
Remember that if you decide to sign a contract, you’ll need to think about all the terms very, very carefully. You must point out all the terms that are crucially important for you, and you’ll hardly be able to write them all down on the same page. Creating such an agreement is time-consuming, but it’s worth every minute you spend thinking about your ideal sugar relationship—that’s how you can get exactly what you want without any unpleasant surprises.
Pros & Cons of having a sugar relationship contract for a SD
A relationship contract with your sugar baby is obviously a good idea since it regulates your relationship and clearly points out all the rights and responsibilities of both parties. At the same time, such a contract has both pros and cons for a sugar daddy, so let’s talk about those.
Pros
- The contract clarifies all the sugar baby’s responsibilities in your relationships
- It usually includes the number of meetings per week or month so that a SB cannot refuse to meet you
- Most contracts indicate a monthly fee, it means a SB cannot demand more money from you
- You can add any preferences and/or desires to your contract, and your sugar baby will have to fulfill them
- You can terminate your contract at any time and finish the relationship with a SB if you want
Cons
- You most likely won’t be able to ask for any additional services if they’re not indicated in the contract
- You will have to pay a lawyer for making this contract for you
Pros & Cons of having a sugar relationship contract for a SB
Many sugar babies have relationship contracts with their sugar daddies, but what are the pros and cons of such a contract for a sugar baby? Let’s take a look at those together.
Pros
- A SB doesn’t have to provide the services that are not indicated in the contract
- You can set your boundaries and limits and indicate them in the document
- Your monthly fee is going to be indicated in the contract so that a SD will not pay you less
- A contract helps to clarify such things as your ability to date other people, the amount of times you have to meet your SD per week, your responsibilities, etc., which reduces the chances of misunderstanding and conflicts
Cons
- You might not notice some points and sign the contract that does not meet your requirements
- You will most likely have to hire a lawyer to take a look at the contract before signing it, which is pretty expensive
Verdict on sugar contracts: Is creating them a good idea?
It seems that everything is simple—you create an online profile of an SB or an SD on a niche website like Secret Benefits or SugarDaddy.com, meet sugar dates, go on first dates with them and then decide how much time you want to spend with this man or woman (or men/women, such relationships aren’t always exclusive). Such a form of dating has a lot of benefits, actually, but there are drawbacks, too. In particular, even if you meet an ideal woman on the site, meet her and discuss all the conditions, you never know if you should or shouldn’t worry about whether she will or won’t follow them and will leave you with all your cash.
The same goes for SBs. They can meet a guy on the site, start dating him, get money from him. But one day, he can leave without paying an allowance for the last month. Things like that happen.
The sugar industry is controversial, and most participants are usually aware of risks. However, creating official agreements is the way to avoid them. They are in the gray area, that’s true, but don’t the other hand, this gray area also allows this form of an agreement to exist. If your relationship involves companionship, friendship, regular meetings, i.e., things but sex, it can’t be considered illegal. So, if you want to make sure that things won’t go wrong, contact your lawyer to find out if you can create it and enjoy a genuinely honest relationship.
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